Thursday, April 19, 2012

I can't see

... It's not every day that you are met with complete freedom of expression, every thought pouring into your head igniting the crocodile portion of your brain [the preheistoric and blatantly base emotional centre of your personality]. Today has been a real corner turner.

Casually wiping tears of joy from my face as I headed towards a place [any place] where I could off load my thoughts, I settled upon a pub which sits adjacent a roundabout. The significance is that I have some choices to make. The irony of being situated at a junction of 3 busy roads is not lost on me either. I write this blog post with watery eyes.

I describe myself as loyal, hard working, passionate, can be inspired at times, and definitely productively self centred.

Loneliness. That's a horrible feeling isn't it? It creeps up on you, and you are willing to upturn reality just so that you can avoid its painful clutches.

During my childhood I was very lonely. Seeking attention was the only way I could find the interaction that I craved.

Every single child NEEDS attention. To feel important, and loved. They also need guidance....

Saturday, April 07, 2012

Optimums Prime trumps Witches! Bitches!!

Ever since I can remember, creativity has been a hugely important area of my life.

I was always picking up pencils, felt -tips, materials and crayons. It didn't matter what I was drawing, colouring in or building - so long as other people got a chance to see my work. That was important. I wanted to be able to announce to the world that "I did that".

Obviously it did not always happen as I intended. My interest waned pretty fast, as I moved from one project to another. Failing each time.

Friday, April 06, 2012

That's a good question

It's amazing, life that is. We can flow quite contently from one experience to another, only paying lip service to the lessons taught to us by our parents or mentors. Is it we do not understand the lessons or ourselves? Yet.

I say yet, because at one point in time, and this point could be literally, anytime - it will dawn on us that we are the architects of our own success and destruction.

The unfortunate thing, for the more strong minded and stubborn amongst us, this realisation may occur on our death beds. Don't laugh. It happens.

My life has been a loaded tunnel of realisations and epiphanies.
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